Am I a Cancer survivor? Yes. I Am.
Diagnosed with stage 2 invasive lobular breast cancer at the age of 30. I still, to this day, sit in my oncologist office, waiting to be seen. I often talk amongst other patients, listening to their struggles. Thinking of how I felt to sit in the same chair. The chemo chair. Thinking of how it felt to have the needle forced into the port on my chest. Thinking if how it felt for Beth, my chemo nurse (angel), to push the Adriamycin into my young frail body. To sit and keep my spirits up, knowing I would be in bed, detached from the world, for at least another five days. To be useless to my children, and myself.
To think back on how I felt.. All the journals, and blogs…all about me. So self-absorbed.. but at the time, that is how I felt, and damn it…I was entitled. From now on though, I realize that this is more than survivorship. It is about engagement, activism, involvement, and advocacy. I will fight until no more lives are lost. Until no more “Mommies” have to worry about seeing their daughters grow up. Until no more “Mommies” have to watch their daughters fight for their lives, as my “Mommy” did, and until no more daughters have to watch their “Mommies” suffer the way my daughter did.
To have had some time to put this all into perspective has given me a new outlook. Now, when I converse with a newly diagnosed survivor, I feel distinctly separate from them. I see them sitting, waiting for their first chemo treatment, not knowing what to expect. Hair still intact, no clue as to what is about to happen. I do not pity them, but I can reassure them. I can relate, but yet I feel no comfort in the fact that I am no longer one of them. I can give my own personal advice, and only hope that they will listen. I have, so far, won my battle, and feel like I was left here for a reason. If I can help just one woman in her fight, I have served my purpose.
My ultimate mission, and goal, is…By the time my daughter would have to be worried about this horrific disease…It will be non-existant. It will be something of the past. I can only hope, that you, my friends, will join me in this fight. PLEASE, spread the awareness, do not be afraid to tell your best friend, your sister, or your mom, to check their boobies. Cancer does NOT discriminate!!! I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Invasive Lobular Breast Cancer at age 30 , and my baby sister at age 27, with Hodgkins Lymphoma. We are both SURVIVORS.
You may need to be your own advocate. I was told “you are young, it is probably nothing, follow up in 6 months.” That was bull. YOU know your body. YOU will know if something is not right!! Do not be afraid to go with your gut. I had to fight for EVERY test I had, and I thank God every day that I did!!!
PLEASE help me in the fight against Breast Cancer! Together we can make a difference. Let’s make this something we tell our great grand children about! Something that will make them ask…What was that?...And hopefully we can answer… Nothing that you will ever have to worry about!!! Thanks for reading!!!!xoxo